Tuesday, 6 November 2012

Being a 32 year old male, a father and someone who grew up with the likes of hulk hogan, ultimate warrior and other such larger than life characters I was quietly looking forward to smashing heads in with steel chairs, exciting story lines and strange matches that would keep me button bashing until the early hours, But sadly with this I was so overwhelming disappointed with it all i would have rather painted my living room and done all the house chores my wife to be has been nagging me to do. This is why.

The graphics, They haven't moved on since the last one or the seven before. Every character is stupidly buff even Man kind, who as a kid remember him being like a fat math's teacher with a pain threshold of a honey badger. Not with huge arms like sly stallone. None of them have and distinguished features and the facial hair looks like my 3 month old daugher had a go with paint shop pro. The crowd look like they were hand picked from top of the pops in the seventies, and they have all got near the same animations on there ring entrances which is repetitive at best. When you do injure your adversary in the ring their is no bruising at all, bust them open and all you get is a paint ball wound to the head. Mortal Kombat had done a better job of this.

Now the story lines.... What story lines? The "attitude era"in which i grew up with was entertaining, violent and was the birth places of Steve austin, the Rock and DX. I played all of three matches before i started to feel "wow that was WCW amazing in comparison how did they go bust if this was to go by?" The universe is nothing exciting to go by either you just play matches and the campaign is just predictable as an eastenders storyline.

The Make your own guy is so complicated! I took up Quantum Physics because I had more of a fighting chance working that out than making a new wrestler..... sorry superstar. Thats just getting to look like something half decent.Once you admit defeat that your guy ( who always now looks like the Hoff) is ready, You decide: i know im going to do his moves set, finisher, and intro.....Three hours later.I choose this music JUST THE MUSIC!. I was so frustrated at this point i needed to go for a walk just to calm down and to ensure my cat his life was no longer in danger.

The controls I stopped scream at the tv and now have a blister on my thumb with an X in it because it didnt matter how hard i hit that button the games response time was slower than a slug with depression. I have to say I used to like the older games but if i had 40 pounds to spend i would have a mountain of chocolate or 2 hours of anger management before i handed it over for this game. Also if any one ever called it a simulation they are so so so so very wrong and dumb.

Im so very disappointed. I had high hopes for this game an evolution in WWE these guys have more money than god and could not put a game together with more creditability? Well I hope my pain has become some one elses gain because im never getting my time back.